With the sadness, heartbreak and struggles of this year came a breakthrough in a personal goal – to live on my own.
I do sometimes feel a sort of “survivor’s guilt”…like, how can I be happy in a year like this? Of course I’ve deal with the struggles as everyone else is emotionally with quarantine. And we’ve had people in my family lose friends to Covid – it’s very real. However, with that came the chance for me to to save money and re-evaluate my spending habits, and since I was in a dry household I didn’t have a vice to put my sorrows into. I mean, I do tend to eat my feelings, but my weight hasn’t gone up a ton, and I could have shopped, but my desires went away.
I faced my fears them head on. It was a rough time with anxiety…but pushing through that made me stronger and be able to rock the demons. From all of that, I decided to take a chance and do what I’ve wanted to further be able to focus on my life and what I wanted to do. So I moved to Brooklyn, NY. A nice neighborhood near the south of the borough where I have a one bedroom apartment, high up, laundry in the building (on my floor!), grocery store a block away, subway a block away, plenty of buses and a beautiful view of a bridge and area to walk around in. It’s perfect for me right now.
The apartment was shown to me by a realtor who doesn’t ever do rentals. She does sales for coops and apartments in the city (New York City). How’s that for chance? When mom and I went to the open house, I got immediate good vibes from the space and from the realtor. I think she also felt it because of the way we were talking – I was asking questions, she was answering them, but it was a lovely banter where we were both comfortable with each other and both silently though “yes, this person is for this place”.
And so, a month later after I thought I didn’t qualify for it (because I didn’t have all that much in savings as the landlord though I should) the realtor convinced me to not give up and I proved that I was an able and responsible tenant. What seemed like a lifetime (about 3 weeks) I then finally got approved. At the end of October, I moved in.
It’s been super chill. I almost feel guilty at how happy I feel at night when I put my colorful LED lights and watch my big TV. Sometimes I game, sometimes I read, sometimes I’ll meet up with a friend or my parents, but overall I’m really happy. I can focus and my head feels so incredibly clear.
Spiritual self – ✔
Financial self – ✔
Time to work on my professional and physical self.
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